My New Habit, Change

Why do we resist the changes that need to happen in ourselves?  Or why can’t those changes just automatically happen.  Why can’t I get revelation for something that I need to change, store it away and as I sleep my mind just automatically changes?  Wouldn’t that be amazing?  There are things the Lord has been revealing to me, areas that I need to change my actions, my outlook, my attitudes, etc.  But this is such a struggle, I am so used to acting (or better reacting) a certain way in certain situations, that as much as my heart has wanted the change, my mouth does not show that.  I immediately revert back to the same old ways.  Even worse, I am not sure when or why these certain responses started.  And sadly at this point, it seems that I do not realize my words or attitudes until it has already come out of my mouth. 

I have begun to get used to feeling the need to defend myself, versus really trying to hear what someone else is saying.  I automatically assume that this person does not have my best interest at heart.  I do not let the Lord filter the words, I hear certain things and it’s like I automatically tune out everything else after that.  I guess it’s like a button has just been pushed and off I go.  Creating this new habit is like creating any other habit, it definitely takes discipline.  I guess a change in our thoughts and attitudes takes the same type of discipline that doing anything else does.  It is a daily thought process and execution of these new things.  Trying our best to make these new changes and to stick to them.  It is so easy to get the revelation, and to realize what needs to be changed.  However, at least for me, my execution of these things is what needs work.

I am amazed at how much the Lord is revealing, it seems like so many things I need to be reminded of each day and to be disciplined in.  And yet, they are all tied in together in these amazingly intricate ways that only the Lord can put  together.  I guess all I can say to that is Lord please help me, without you there is no way!  I couldn’t even take a breath without Him, forget doing anything else.